Beautiful

If you know me you should know that I use the word "beautiful" probably a little bit to often. I don't know when I picked it up or why I started using it so much, but now it seems like it is my adjective for everyone and everything. One "beautiful" friend pointed this out to me a couple months ago and I have been pondering the thought of "beautiful people" and "beautiful things" since then. 


Lately, Father has been showing me many things about myself that are not so beautiful and rather are nasty, dirty, and so very sinful. Moving to this "beautiful country" has brought about many opportunities to learn about myself. About how I react to high stress situations, how I act to feeling incompetent in life, how I handle the difficulty of learning a language, and basically how I adapt to such a huge life transition. All of these things at some point have brought about some nasty reactions and some sinful parts of my heart that I don't enjoy viewing.


In viewing this hidden sin in my life, there have been days when I have been discouraged and times when I don't understand how in the world Father can continually show me grace. I sometimes think he gets annoyed or frustrated with me when I continue in my sin, (making Father out to be someone He is not is a whole other blog) and I think that he gives me grace because He has to.... you know because he is the Almighty and thats what he does and suppose to do.

Sometimes I get more shameful and embarrassed at the thought of how people will view me if they knew my sin and if their opinion of me would change, then i do when I think about Father viewing my sin. So dumb! How much more does Father know about me than anyone on this earth and how much more does it hurt Him to see His daughter sin against HIm. He sees my sin every day, every single last sinful thought that I have he sees in that moment. The thought of Him being all knowing plus the hope that people wouldn't change their opinion about me is the reason I sometimes feel like Father gets frustrated with me in my sin.

When you think about the good news and what it really means to be made alive,  you have to think about what you came from. When Father chooses to save you, he literally pulls you out of a dead sea. We were lifeless, without any hope at all. Drowning in our sin. We were dust on the earth. No form, no purpose. That glorious day when He pulled you out of death and dust, he formed you into a beautiful thing. He made you righteous in His sight no matter the sin you lived in. Even though we sin against the Almighty daily, He will see us through His sons blood on that day when we stand before Him.

While we are still living on this earth he DELIGHTS in making us look, reflect, think, act, speak, and love like Him. This truth is so sobering for me. He NEVER looks at me with frustrated eyes or annoyance at my repentance. When I come to Him with sorrow over sinning against Him, He will never begrudgingly give me grace. 

Behold my servant, whom I uphold, 

 my chosen, in whom my soul delights; 

I have put my Spirit upon him; 

he will bring forth justice to the nations.

Isaiah 42:1

My son, do not despise the Lords discipline

or be weary of his reproof

for the Lord reproves those he loves

as a father the son in whom he delights.

Proverbs 3:12

I think that Father rolls his eyes at me when I ask for forgiveness yet again for that sin that I keep going back to. I feel so shameful for the sin that I have so much trouble with and seem to never be rid of. BUT Oh, how he delights in our repentance, he delights in our desire to be like HIm, he delights that we hate our sin, he delights in making us beautiful.


A song that I have always loved has come back into my life recently (I go through cycles of listening to my music, so sometimes I neglect some of my favorites because I try to listen to all of my music.... random weird thing about Katy). Of course the title is "Beautiful Things" by a band named Gungor. (Go listen to it now if you've never heard it!!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyPBtExE4W0&feature=related) The chorus is simply this:

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us


You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new
You are making me new


Praise Father that he is making me new and he makes beautiful things out of dust and of us (we were dust) because if He didn't I would still be a dead lifeless, hopeless body drowning in my sin. With his salvation he made us ALIVE and with  his discipline, reproof, and continual grace he makes us BEAUTIFUL!! 


So in conclusion, I have decided that I like the word "beautiful" even more now and will continue to use it. Saying that a person is beautiful holds so much more weight to me now and I love it. I love that it means more than just a superficial descriptive word or just some random thing that I do. It is an adjective that describes what Father is making us out to be. 

Why shouldn't I use this word maybe a little bit to often?!